Who is Jean Grae?

Jean is a super hero. She's better than you at doing everything. Even stuff you haven't done yet. She writes raps and makes music too. All of which are better than your raps or music, if you do that sort of thing.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Dear Activia,


WTF?!?!?!?!

Just .. look man...I know what you're for. I get it. I do. That being said......

You can't have NO timetable on WHEN you're going to up and work like that. That's crazy.
2 weeks is fucking grossly (no pun intended)inaccurate. This is nutty(pun intended).

I had things to do and you just completely ignore the fact that people have LIVES and JOBS and PLANS. You are dumb. You are a dumb little yogurt with no couth.

Here are 2 other DUMB things I have had the displeasure of seeing advertised.


Yeeeah. What I REALLY dig about the cats who came up with this revolutionary idea, is the clever name they chose. "Shoes Under".

Word? Are we at this point now? Shoes fucking UNDER? I'm going to stop pressing buttons on my technology rectangle here. I want to curse them out with my face hole word former. Later I'm ..oh fuck it.. OOGA BOOGADY BOO.



IDIOT WITHOUT ROPE AKA CARDIO JUMP
I hope you clicked on that.
Now you're in on the laziest, active shit I've ever seen in my life.
Ok.... I can understand....maybe there ISN'T room to jump rope. Cool...

But... umm. couldn't you just..sigh.. just DO THE SAME THING WITHOUT THIS PRODUCT IN YOUR HANDS???

Are we soooo over COUNTING now? Good lord.
This shit is....ugh. I weep for the future. We're not going to know how to do anything organically for ourselves.

This Activia needs to stand down. STAND DOWN I SAY!

11 comments:

JohnnyACE♠ GRAND MASTER SEN$Ei {{-_-}}™ said...

WELL DAMN!!!

You're the shit! Matter of fact, you're the ACTIVIA!!

{{-_-}}

Phil said...

My lady had no clue that Activia would work as fast as it did, either, so when my mom gave it to her on the humble just for lunch at work, she was totally caught off guard the rest of that entire day. She had to admit she felt great the next morning, tho, but never touched the stuff again!

dramatik said...

lol that Cardio Jump is the lamest thing I've ever seen...well in a while that is. Like you said - why can't you just jump up and down on your own?? Well...I'm off to place my order for Cardio Jump!

starfishncoffee said...

Yeah and Shoes Under doesn't even FIT under my damn IKEA bed.
I'm staying FAR away from Activia. And now I have that damn jingle in my head...

Busy B said...

shoes under wat? sounds like an incomplete sentence. um...ropeless design? lmao!

Urban Survival Syndrome said...

Activia sounds like it gives you the liquid goodness. You know the bad kind of liquid goodness. Makes me think of these fiber bars I started eating this week. The brand is Fiber One. Well first day I was just snacking on those great tasting bars. I have the oats & chocolate ones so they are super delicious. Well I didn't pay attention to the fact that one bar is 35% of your daily fiber intake. I believe I had 4 or 5 bars. You know the rest of the story.

Russ said...

THIS is the reason you're not getting commercial deals, jean.

Anonymous said...

Hey Ms. Grae, Shoes Under is kinda dumb, but "think of all the space you'll save!" +, cardio jump is fuckin genius

Bradford J. Howard said...

This Cardio Jump ish is HILARIOUSLY idiotic!!!

Anonymous said...

"activiaaaa"..."this is nuts"(pun intended) fuckin priceless.

Midiots Beats said...

Can you read romanian? That's the language in the Activia photo. :)